So THAT’S why we haven’t had any trouble getting him to take naps and he’s gone to sleep at night without complaint.

Judging from the drama that ensued at bedtime last night, I think it’s safe to say that those days are over – at least until he gets used to falling asleep on his own.

New bedtime slogan: Hugs, not Drugs.  :)

Exhibit A

Of course, youth ministry is in my blood so I couldn’t give it up completely.  After 6 years of vocational youth ministry, I’m volunteering again.

I show up, love teenagers, and go home to my family.

Somewhere along the way, during these past few years, I misplaced my passion. I’m not sure if it was hiding under the staff meeting agendas or the fundraising letters or the newsletter articles or the book I was required to read about leadership (I won’t share the title because it’s not worth reading).

Wherever it was hiding, it’s nice to have it back.

It’s weird to say that I’m glad I’m no longer getting paid to do youth ministry, but I am.  Being a volunteer … rocks!

Add in a 3 month old baby and a middle of the night thunderstorm.

Thankfully, Xander slept through the whole thing and we never lost power (unlike most of the town).  I’m actually not sure what I would have done if the power had gone out – there definitely would have been tears and quite possibly a call to my mom begging her to come over and play boggle by candlelight.

I’m happy to report that with all the downstairs windows closed and the deadbolt in use, we survived our first night. I even managed to sleep for a few hours, once the storm died down.

I wonder what I could watch to counteract all the crime shows.  Maybe this…

He’ll be teaching the Mexican Hat Dance at Arthur Murray.

Juuuuust kidding.  :)

He’ll be working overnights which will be an adjustment for us – but we’ll take it!

God is SO good!!

The joy that he has brought into our lives in that short time is immeasurable.

I happened to look something up about diaphragmatic hernias yesterday (the condition X was born with) and was quickly reminded that the chance of survival is only 38%.  I think it’s safe to say that he hasn’t just survived. He’s thriving!

He’s become such a chunky monkey and the world’s happiest baby.  He smiles and laughs his days away.  My mom thinks it’s because there’s so much laughter around him on a daily basis.  He was born into a VERY happy home.

Tim has decided that 3 months is old enough to sleep in his own room. I have no doubt that he was ready weeks ago. It was me that needed more time. I’m sure I’ll be getting up a few times during the first few nights – just to check on him.

I’m going to spend some time this week scrolling back in my FB feed to the first few days after he was born. I want to print all the comments and prayers that were posted. I’m planning on starting a journal for him and I’ll include the printed pages. I want to be able to tell him how God was glorified through him – even from the first few hours of his life.

I will also print the epic stories about “Xander, Defender of the People” that his father wrote for him before he was born.  I want him to know how much he was loved and he prayed for, from the moment he was conceived.

His dedication on Mother’s Day almost seemed like a formality to me because we have placed him before the Lord since the day we found out I was pregnant.

I regularly tell him stories about God and how much He loves him. I know he can’t understand them yet – but I don’t think you can start that sort of habit too soon.

Plus, it helps me make sure I never forget that I am one BLESSED mommy!!

I thought I would miss my job. I don't.

It’s spring cleaning time at my house. This is the first year I’ve had much space to worry about. The last several years, I’ve been in a tiny apartment. I could do a super cleaning job on the entire place in one afternoon.  That’s not the case this year – and I”m not complaining!!!

This is also the first year I’ve had a baby in the house.  Blocking out an entire day (or 2) for cleaning is just simply not going to happen.  Again, not complaining!  I love spending my days with Xander. It just requires a change in how I approach big projects.

So, here’s my plan: I’m going to tackle one room at a time. Every time Xander falls asleep, I’ll get to cleaning in that room. When it’s finally done, I’ll move on to the next.

I realize that I will never have the satisfaction of an entirely clean house because, by the time I get the last room cleaned, the first few rooms will be trashed again.

But there are more important things than a clean house … right?  :)

I think I’ve bought into a lie … and I’m pretty sure I’ve helped others buy into it too.

Our current circumstances are not great. We are very honestly facing eviction if we don’t come up with a large sum of money within the next few days. Up until I blogged about it yesterday, we had only told a handful of people the truth about our situation.  Everyone said the same thing: “The Lord will provide.”  That’s exactly what I would say.  In fact, I have been saying that.  I have KNOWN that we will be able to keep our house because the Lord will provide.

But when Xander woke me up at 3:30 this morning, I started thinking.  It’s 6:00 now – and I’m still thinking.  What is the scriptural proof for that statement?  Does it really say anyplace in the bible that I will never be homeless because the Lord will provide?

Here’s the truth… there are homeless people all over the world that are much better disciples of Christ than I will ever be.

Since the first time I read it in my early 20′s, Romans 8 has been one of my favorite parts of the bible.  I love the thought that nothing can separate us from Christ. I never read it for what it really says until this morning.  It pretty much says that we could very well face trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword.  If that wasn’t true then why would we need to be told that those things can’t separate us from Christ?   I like to think about the assurance in Christ part but I don’t want to think about the fact that I may have to face down a guy wielding a sword at some point.

It reminds me of another widely quoted verses: Jeremiah 29:11. I’ve written that verse in countless graduation cards. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I discovered verse 29:10. This is what the LORD says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place.  So basically, what I told all those graduating seniors is “God has great things planned for you – but you may need to wait 70 years for any of them to happen.”   It just doesn’t have the same ring to it that way.

Where did we get this idea that bad things won’t happen to us because we follow Christ?  I mean, we know we’ll have rough days. But do any of us honestly think we will have to endure the stuff in Romans 8:35?  I’ll admit, I don’t really think I’ll ever have to go naked because I just simply don’t have clothes. But WHY don’t I think that?  People are living that way at this very moment. Even Christians (gasp). What’s so great about me that I should be more fortunate than other people?

I think I’ve bought into this Americanized gospel that says the Lord will provide for our needs – as we define them.

The Lord provided for my ONE AND ONLY true need when He sent his son to die for me.

Now the question is – if I end up naked, starving and running from a guy with a sword, will I still be able to love Him?

That’s the question I wrestle with today.

The only good reason to be up at 5:00 in the morning!